Una malvada en bikini de leopardo

Rock'n'roll a volumen brutal + frankestein cachondo = 2000 Maníacos

Señores: 2000 Maníacos está a punto de cumplir ya 21 añitos, aunque aún sigue festejando los 20 que cumplió en 2009 con su último y aún calentito ejemplar, en una orgía ininterrumpida de cerveza japonesa, rock’n’roll bestia, chicas ligeras de ropa y voraces monstruos asesinos que salen de repente de detrás de la barra o de debajo de la cama, dispuestos a devorarte el cerebelo.


El fanzine 2000 Maníacos, que nació en el infausto verano de 1989, ha sido durante estos años la Biblia Bizarra de varias generaciones de alegres descerebrados que han acudido a él ávidos de sangre, mordiscos, tetas, culos y cualquier otra delicatessen que el cine de derribo pueda ofrecer. Y no sólo el cine, porque si sus páginas han reseñado, diseccionado y viviseccionado tanto el cine de serie B, Z y Doble Z en todas sus variantes (zombies, gore, porno, sadomaso, coprofagia, halitosis, blaverismo) también lo han hecho respecto a la literatura más casposa, la mitomanía más peligrosa o el cómic underground más trash.

Número a número, los miembros de la Secta del Inframundo de los Ectoplasmas hemos podido deleitarnos, ilustrarnos, emocionarnos, sobrecogernos, alucinarnos, empalmarnos, horrorizarnos y corrernos varias veces seguidas (“¡oh dios, aún puedo!!”) gracias a su sabiduría divina y a su estilo cafre y deslenguado.

En un resúmen de palabras clave: “sustos, sexo, monstruos, chascarrillos, azotazos, tetas, vísceras, humor y sobresaltos”. Es decir, lo mejor de cada casa, lo que de verdad te interesa, lo que te pone. Lo que todos desearíamos hacer.

Y hablar de 2000 Maníacos es hablar de Manuel Valencia (alias Manolo, alias Manolín, con ficha policial en el estado de Alabama número X2-JU8-666). Un personaje irrepetible, digno padre (o hijo) de su producto, periodista de prestigio, cineasta de pedigrí, enciclopedista del porno, cronista de la más cruda realidad, amigo o enemigo según cómo se levante, descacharrante guionista televisivo, el primer punki pata negra, mala influencia (ya me lo dice mi madre) y tantas cosas más (todas buenas) y que, pese a todo, siempre está dispuesto a invitarte a un copazo. Un gran partido como yerno para cualquier suegra que se precie.

Y todo ello sin olvidar a sus más íntimos colaboradores en el fanzine, pájaros como Charly Álvarez, Álex Zinéfilo, Pipo el Payaso Borrachín y algunos fanfarrones más, unos elementos de cuidado a los que más vale no darles nunca la espalda.

Felicidades por el aniversario, chatos!!

Manson, el amigo de los niños

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